With this seemingly ridiculous holiday around the corner, i decided to find out what there is to it besides buying your partner or lover flowers and candy. Don’t get me wrong; Who doesn’t love getting flowers?

Wow, no wonder i never knew the history of St. Valentines Day, because it seems that almost no one knows the true history of it! According to Wikipedia, in ancient Rome there was a holiday called Lupercalia which came at the end of a 3 day fertility festival called Juno Februa, in which the names of young women were put into a vessel and drawn by young men, and whoever drew her name, she got to have sex with for the rest of the festival. Apparently, on Lupercalia,

“many of the noble youths and magistrates run up and down through the city naked for sport and laughter, striking those they meet with shaggy thongs.” - Plutarch

And apparently, it was quite an honor to get smacked with a naked boy’s “shaggy thong,” as all the women would go to the street and hold out their hands to be struck, hoping to become pregnant or have good luck with their childbirth.

Well, Pope Gelasius didn’t like all this sex play, so he abolished the festival and decided that the feast of Saint Valentine would take its place. Valentine apparently was known for secretly performing marriages despite the fact that Emperor Caudius II had banned all marriages in Rome because married men made bad soldiers. He was jailed and legend says that he fell in love with the jailer’s daughter during his incarceration. The legend says that before he was put to death, he passed a love note to her that was signed, “From your Valentine.” (Do we teach our children these lies?)
Everything after that is kind of a blur, except that in the 80’s the diamond industry began trying to turn it into a holiday for giving diamonds. Big surprise.
At any rate, i think we should do away with our current Valentines day traditions and go back to running through the streets naked, spanking people with shaggy thongs. Doesn’t that sound like much more fun? Come on, who’s with me? Hey, wait, we already have something very similar to this in San Francisco. It’s called the Folsom Street Fair, a leather and fetish fair that takes place on the last Sunday of September. It’s just as well, though. February is a little too cold here to be running around naked smacking people with our shaggy thongs, don’t you think?

Popularity: 38% [?]

As i watched the Dixie Chicks perform “I’m Not Ready To Make Nice,” at first i got chills, and then tears in my eyes, and a tear rolled down my cheek as i watched this historical moment. I envy them for having the courage to speak out, and i feel sorry for them for having to endure the hatred of all those ignorant people. Yes, they won song of the year, record of the year, album of the year, and 2 other Grammies tonight!

Hey, who knew that Justin Timberlake could play the piano? I’m impressed.

Fantasia Barrino, if you’re out there, why aren’t you up there winning these awards that Mary J. Blige is winning? You have the best r&b voice in the world right now, and Mary’s voice sounds like SHIT!!! Hurry up and make a good album! I need you Fantasia, Mary is making my ears bleed! Honestly, her voice is muddy and dull, and half the time she’s just not quite in tune. What does anybody see in Mary J.? I just don’t understand.

So, Amanda Ghost co-wrote James Blunt’s “You’re Beautiful”! Wow. Amanda, i’ve been waiting for you to release another album, too!

Wow, look at that! The entire upper half of Smokey Robinson’s face doesn’t move! I mean not a single muscle! Ok, that’s just creepy!!! Botox bad!

I wonder what John Legend looks like naked.

To keep music in our schools, go to Grammy.com!!!

Another tear-jerker moment, the tribute to James Brown, when they brought out his cape and hung it on the microphone.

Holy shit! Justin plays the guitar, too!

Woah! That Chevy HHR commercial was crazy! My jaw dropped for that one!

Dixie Chicks “Not Ready”

Popularity: 10% [?]

I never watch the news, I hate it, and now there is yet another reason why.

I’m watching E.R., and just saw a commercial advertising a program that will show potential thieves exactly how to break into your house in a whole new way, complete with pictures and full instructions. This program is the KCRA channel 3 news. They seem to think they are doing a good thing by showing you how to protect yourself, but they are also showing all you aspiring home robbers how to fulfill your dreams.

They do this stupid shit all the time, too! I’ll bet you anything that the number of home robberies involving [this method of break-in] will go up after this news broadcast, and if it does, i definitely think that channel 3 should be held partially responsible! I am hopeful that it will lead to a class action lawsuit. Anyone publishing instructions for new methods of committing crime is doing something unlawful, i don’t care who it is! They totally crossed the line between warning the public and facilitating crime, yet again!

Popularity: 17% [?]

Internationally known nude photographic artist Spencer Tunick is looking for volunteers to participate in his future art works.

Imagine… getting to get naked with a bunch of other people, being in a work of art that will be seen by (who knows how many) people, and finding an excuse to travel! What could be better? I bet it would be an unforgettable experience!

Popularity: 25% [?]

I’ve spent the last week working on our new aquarium. It used to be a marine aquarium, but the fish kept dying, so we finally gave up and decided to turn it into a freshwater tank instead. I had to empty it, clean it, clean the filter to get rid of all the salt, clean all the gravel and ornaments from an older tank, and put it all together. A lot of work, but well worth it.

It is a 55 gallon tank with a wet/dry external sump filter that sits in the cabinet below. The overflow is built into the black column in the back of the tank. It is a great filtration system, but that black column is unsightly, so i used it as an opportunity to create a dramatic “riverbank,” enhanced by the shadow created by omitting one of the lights in the hood. I used only plastic wood, and mostly plastic plants for easier maintenance. I think it looks pretty cool. We used Bio-Spira to quickly cycle the tank so we could add the fish quickly.

Popularity: 13% [?]